I could think of three definitions for COLLECT:

• To collect as in to gather, pick up, or sort.

This, the final week in the month and the quarter, I am collecting my thoughts to move forward. I am collecting ideas and memories. I’m planning a brand new novel in OCTOBER and writing it in NOVEMBER. It’s the best and worst time of the year. The best creatively, the worst emotionally. I’m both picking flowers and packing for survival.

• To collect as in to own and add to a collection.

This year I am not adding to my collection of stationery (fortunately or unfortunately I can’t afford it), so I will be collecting all the unused spaces and tools and crafting new ones. I’m also adding to my collection of novels. The collection of stories in my head and those I have translated to paper.

• To collect as in to claim a debt.

I think I’m due a fair amount of credit for making it through the year thus far and thriving at that. I want not the credit but the kudos and not from you but from me (though I’ll take yours too). I don’t mean to suggest the year hasn’t been hard and all is right with the world. I just think I’m doing pretty good under the circumstances.

Stay tuned for PLANNING, PLOTTING, DRAFTING, and OUTLINING guides through PREPTOBER.

I’m really looking forward to sharing my ideas and progress here.

Thanks for giving me a reason to keep blogging.

xxxlinsey

Emily P. Freeman, co-founder of hope*writers, gave a free webinar on clarity for writers. Before I was able to join, I had the option to answer this question:

One year from now…what do you hope to be true?

She was referring to my writing journey, but as usual, I decided to take the question to the next level and apply it to my whole damn life. I want to solve everything, but maybe that’s too big.

Maybe the writing journey IS the journey I’m on at the moment.

One year from now…what do you hope to be true?

I didn’t answer her then, but now I’ve had some time, and the benefit of her webinar to answer it more fully. I got my clarity.

Right now I’m not moving anywhere. I need to be. I want to be running toward my goal, not standing here stagnant. I thought first about saying I want to be published, but I want that to be a fact, not a hope.

One year from now, what do I hope to be true…

I hope to be running. Not held back by fear or doubt. I hope to be free from my current burdens and to have the luxury of choice.

linsey ewing

Emily was absolutely right that I need some DIRECTION and the place to start is with my new VISION STATEMENT. That’s my next right step and I’m taking it today.

She says a vision statement should be 4 things:
1. Short
2. Simple
3. Hopeful
4. NOT ABOUT YOU

I’ve been brainstorming and this is going to be the header for my new website (coming soon):

EVALUATE. EDUCATE. ELEVATE.

What do you think?

What’s your vision statement? What’s your next right step?

xxxlinsey

Today’s word was COURAGE.

I don’t know if courage is not looking down or not looking up. Maybe it takes courage to do both.

I do know that courage is not the absence of fear, it’s what we do with our fear.

I’m afraid.

I don’t know how I’m going to manage, frankly. I haven’t a clue. I’m learning to trust and go. Move forward in faith and keep on truckin.

Hope*writers started a new challenge: a word prompt a day. Today’s is collaborate. I’ve read about some really good collaborations with husbands, God, even dogs. I love it.

but…

I got nothing.

Don’t get me wrong, I have plenty of people (and a dog) with whom to collaborate. I have writing partners, friends, parents, siblings, and whole communities of online writers.

however…

The only person I really want to be working with right now is myself.

I’ve already decided I am my own ideal audience, and while I strive to write for each and every one of you, I am the one who really needs to hear my words.

I blog because I need a place to record my progress, fight with the words, and make time to produce something every week. Part of my struggle and the part that makes me want to encourage others, is knowing there IS a struggle. It’s real and it’s challenging and it will not go away.

I believe I will succeed one day (in many ways I already have), and I want the road to that success paved with all my unignorable hardships and mess ups.

According to Crystal Paine, blogging should solve a problem, meet a need, and/or provide hope. I’m encouraged that my blog is doing those things for me.

Tell me, is this blog doing any of those things for you?

Can you think of a way to collaborate?

I’ve hit a few brick walls lately.

My goals have been slippery and the progress steep. It’s been hard to get purchase. Hard to find the energy to keep going. 

{still doing it.}

The last part of my walk every weekday morning ends with a steep climb up a tall hill.

It may be the hardest part of the journey.

It also tells me the journey is almost over.

Here is what I’ve learned: The climb is more fun than the tenure part. Getting to the top is more enjoyable than trying to stay there.

Jennifer Weiner Real Simple August 2020

Being at the top is great, but I’m looking forward to the downhill ride. Still, I can’t ignore that some say this is the best part of the journey. The hard part.

{It’s the REAL part anyway.}

…there will always be something bigger and better to chase. The work has to be its own reward, because external validations will never be enough.

Jennifer Weiner Real Simple August 2020

Everybody’s having a hard year. On the whole, I have few complaints.

{I’m climbing steadily uphill.}

THIS IS HOW I FEEL:

The descent from above, especially at night when you can see the lights glowing in the towns and houses around the airport.
Everything looks picture perfect, though somewhere in those houses are people living just like you and me. Nothing magical.

Editing is much the same way: It sounds glamorous, but it’s hard and dismal work. The end result will be worth it, when everything looks as though I intended it that way from the beginning.

After my writing month in JULY, I think I need to take AUGUST off in future.

This shouldn’t be a surprise to me, since MAY was the same after working my way through APRIL‘s CAMP NANOWRIMO, but I am disappointed.

I feel, not that I can do more, but that I should be able to do more, when I just can’t.

It’s an unrealistic expectation, but I expect it nonetheless.

I don’t know what next month holds, nor do I care to plan for it at this point. Don’t tell anybody, but I plan to wing it.

until then,

xxxlinsey

I’ve been thinking…

Am I to blame? Is there something I should have done differently? Does this really have anything to do with me? Is it as bad as all that?

Sometimes things look one way from one perspective and completely upside down from another. I wonder how that happens. Is it a trick of the light? Bad timing? Or totally not what you thought you were looking at at all?

why can’t things just make sense?

This month I have been working on GOODBYE with R and we have made some fantastic progress.

i’m still not happy …

It’s strange looking back on work I started so long ago (five years) and that I labored over so intensely (two of those, I think) and not recognize my own work. It’s hard for me to believe this stuff came out of my head.

except when I come across something stupid, then I’m convinced it’s my work.

I’m walking a tightrope between wanting what I have and having what I want. It’s difficult, but not impossible, to negotiate. Here’s to the third week of the month.

xxxlinsey

I AM A HOPE*WRITER

I was asked to collaborate with another hope*writer on the subject of intentional kindness. This is what I came up with:

Intentional kindness involves thinking ahead to give a gift. Often, I have found, this gift is silence: allowing someone else the space to be themselves. Especially when we don’t agree with their opinions or views, silence can be loving our neighbors in a way that is difficult and sometimes impossible. Silence also leaves room for listening, another intentional kindness.

What do you think?

What is your definition of intentional kindness?

It also made me think of my purpose in being a hope*writer:

I’ve been struggling lately with how I write for Hope.

Hope is part of my daily existence, but in my writing..?

I DON’T KNOW…

So I ask you,

IS THIS BLOG BRINGING YOU HOPE?

If yes, how? and if no, how can it?

Thanks,

xxxlinsey

I did make it to the end of CAMP.

I won.

On the 31st I wrote 5, 905 words. Can you believe that?

I finally realized what my problem was.

I was focused too much on perfection, a constant struggle of mine.

I spent way too much time on the “finished” scenes (in quotes because they are in no way finished, but they are complete) and not enough time writing the “to write” scenes.

Now my KANBAN board looks like this:

In other words, I got off my butt, did the writing I needed to do, and quit worrying about what I had finished or not.

So, that was the end of JULY, what do we have for AUGUST?

Editing GOODBYE.

but more on that next week…Happy August, everyone!

xxxlinsey

Progress: Nil

Progress: Slow

Progress.

It’s been a difficult week. Those of you who know me know I lost a dear part of my little family this week.

We’ve been in mourning, so not a lot of writing has gotten done.

That’s ok.

Sometimes life happens.

CURRENT WORD COUNT: 19,237

Winning means a little over 10k words before Friday at midnight to make a total of 30k.

I still plan to WIN CAMP NANO  by the 31st, and I will update you next week.

Which brings me to August…

anyone want to read anything special?